his eyes: a sketch

i pulled a 5-year-old human outside into the dark onto the back porch. i had a feeling there would be stars, and there were.

he giggled for a minute as i dragged a deck chair from beneath a tree and swept the dead leaves from it.

“alright, let’s lay down and look at the stars.”

he’s still only a human of just 5 years, and hesistant:

“but i’m scared of the dark.” it was more of a question than a statement.

“it’s alright… i’ll hold you, angel.”

it was enough assurance for his little mind and he offered no resistance as i scooped him up and squeezed him snug beside me on the deck chair.

“can you see the stars, honey?” there’s a few trees spread out overhead, with stars tangled in their branches. this little human’s eyes still don’t work quite the way they should, even after surgery, and i’m never sure how much of the visible world they can see – although anyone who meets him knows how much of the world he sifts through his head. often when his brain is turning cogs one of his big blue irises wanders away to the side, giving him the most beautiful look of innocent contemplation.

“yeah.” he’ll never know the relief i felt then.

“look at that one there! the big yellow one. do you see it?” i ask; it hangs directly overhead, just above a dark line of trees.

he sees it, and i tell him that maybe it’s a planet, since it’s so big and bright. he seems enamoured with this. suddenly he exclaims,

“look, another planet! it’s huge and yellow too!”

he points upward and for a moment i search for some outstanding source of light until i realize what he is seeing.

“joe-joe, that’s a LEAF! you thought that yellow leaf was a PLANET!”

he is silent for a moment and then erupts into the most hilarious laugh. a real baby belly-laugh, absolutely uncontrollable and spilling out everywhere – onto the porch and into the previous silence. he can’t stop, and almost falls off the deck chair as i tickle his soft little stomach and squeeze him, repeating “it was a LEAF joe-joe! you’re so crazy!”

“it’s a – (quick inhale) – leaf” he gasps between his laughter, and i realize there’s really nothing in the world like being the lucky person who makes a 5-year absolutely comfortable – comfortable enough to cry laughing with in the pitch dark under a sky of stars. it’s a trust that few little humans are willing to give out, and it can’t be anything less than the most innocent exchange of love and comradery.

i then told him about the big dipper and the little dipper and how some stars are named after animals and how there’s a man in the moon if you really squint.

i didn’t tell him how the big blue orbs beneath his unfairly long lashes, wandering around to the pace of his thoughts, are far more beautiful than all of these.

40 thoughts on “his eyes: a sketch”

      1. Of course!! You are amazing at capturing those little wonder-filled moments through words— don’t ever stop writing ❤️

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  1. Aww this is so dang sweet Jul!! Darling little joe… I could see every moment of this so vividly! Oh the pictures you paint with your words…the special bond between you two is precious ❤
    ~D

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Enchanting as always, Jul! I loved the way you described his laughter, it was just so… heart-warming. It’s definitely a beautiful feeling to have a child trust you. Maybe we all need to spend more time with out inner child to discover that pure joy, you’ve captured here.
    Hope you’re doing great, Jul! ❤️

    Liked by 2 people

    1. ahh you are so kind, D … your words warm my heart :,) it is such a beautiful thing! and yes, you are absolutely right! that’s the purest version of ourselves ❤
      by the way, i’ve disappeared from wordpress for quite a bit, but i’m gonna go back and read the posts of yours that i’ve missed right now!
      thank you ❤❤❤
      power to the local dreamer ||-//

      Liked by 1 person

  3. ABSOLUTELY ADORABLE, JUL!!
    Honestly, this piece inspires me to write more about some of the random little moments of my own life – how you magicially recorded this moment of you and jojo stargazing was absolutely enchanting and I doubt you’ll ever forget it, now that it’s written down for you to look back on.
    Great job, dear. ❤❤❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. ahhh thank you so so much sarah! if it inspired you, then i consider this post a complete success!! you absolutely should write random little moments – it’s so rewarding to write about those experiences – especially the tiny details that fade out of your memory over time – reading it later in life brings the scene back so vividly!
      you’re the best, sarah ❤❤❤
      power to the local dreamer ||-//

      Liked by 1 person

  4. “i then told him about the big dipper and the little dipper and how some stars are named after animals and how there’s a man in the moon if you really squint.

    i didn’t tell him how the big blue orbs beneath his unfairly long lashes, wandering around to the pace of his thoughts, are far more beautiful than all of these.”

    HOW DARE YOU WRITE SOMETHING SO BEAUTIFUL

    Liked by 1 person

    1. :’))) he really had the most gorgeous eyelashes – and eyes – and God put more love into those than he did the entire geographical universe. it’s so absolutely mind blowing !!!

      thank you so so much my friend❤️❤️❤️
      power to the local dreamer ||-//

      Liked by 1 person

    1. oh weez please don’t cry, jul’s gonna sing you a lullaby

      instead and
      maybe take out her dad’s new banjo and strum it softly except that

      the banjo just woke up her little brother so
      maybe that’s not the best idea

      maybe this will do: ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I read that to the tune of hush little baby and calmed right down

        I am jealous of the banjo, not gonna lie

        And

        Yes that is great thank you

        May your brother find sleep

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